By Dr Renita D’Souza
Children are God’s gift and a blessing. Misbehaviors of kids and disciplining them might be exhausting for parents. To discipline your children first know and understand them.
लालयेत् पञ्चवर्षाणि दशवर्षाणि ताडयेत् ।
प्राप्ते तु षोडशे वर्षे पुत्रं मित्रवदाचरेत् ॥
– चाणक्य नीति
lālayet pañcavarṣāṇi daśavarṣāṇi tāḍayet ।
prāpte tu ṣoḍaśe varṣe putraṃ mitravadācaret ॥ – cāṇakya nīti
Till 5 years, the child should be pampered, taken into confidence with love and care.
By10 years, the child should be gently punished whenever he / she commits mistake.
Once the child is 16 year old, the child should be treated as friend.
Let’s see few Bible verses about children being blessing from God:
Children born to a young man are like arrows in a warrior’s hands. (Psalm 127:4)
But Jesus said, “Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of heaven. (Matthew 19:14)
“But watch out! Be careful never to forget what you yourself have seen. Do not let these memories escape from your mind as long as you live! And be sure to pass them on to your children and grandchildren. (Deuteronomy 4:9)
Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it. (Proverbs 22:6)
Read – Symptoms That Hint Towards Different Diseases In Babies
1. Explain the problem
Let’s imagine that child is playing with knife. Now tell the child what is the problem or describe what you see.
“Playing with knife”
When elders describe the problem, it gives children an opportunity to think or tell themselves what to do.
2. Do not accuse instead give Information
Usually children like to take information than accusation. When children are given information about the problem, they usually sort out themselves what needs to be done.
“We have to use the knife carefully. Playing with knifes can cut the fingers”
3. Shorter the reminder, the better
Some children do not like to hear lectures or long explanation. In such case, single word is more effective. Shorter the reminder, the better.
“ The knife”
Read – How Many Times Should Kids Eat In A Day?
4. Tell your feelings
Children or even elders do not like anyone commenting on their character or personality. Example
“ Are you stupid, don’t you know playing with knife can cut your fingers”.
It is difficult to cooperate with someone who is attacking. So, instead of commenting on child’s character lets us express our feelings. Express strong disapproval without attacking child’s character.
“ I am scared if your fingers cut while playing with knife” or “I don’t like playing with knife”
5. Write a note
Sometimes a simple written note is more effective than saying a word.
“Do not touch me, I can cut your fingers too” or “Playing with me can be hurtful”
Child reading this note on the knife would be careful while handling it. Sometimes you might also be responded with a smile or a hug.